alexis in the city

Could my ten-year-old self have been right?

I remember the exact moment. I was about ten. I was riding bikes with my mom down the palm tree-lined street in our unnecessarily ritzy neighborhood in Florida. I say “unnecessary” because even a ten-year-old knows all Florida is is sand and heat and humidity and the eternal quest for air conditioning or water. But I surprisingly don’t remember those things. All I remember about this moment is telling my mom what I wanted to do with my life:

I wanted to be a TV newscaster.

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how to get bloggers to work with you

i’ve been working on a long, lengthy post on the insights i’m gaining while reading “jesus for president.” however, my faithful, amazing computer that had been with me on my journey for nearly two years (can you tell i was attached!) died over the weekend, taking with it the post i’d been writing. since then, i have NOT been motivated to start all over. in the absence of a post for over a week (gasp!) i’m linking to my internet friend’s blog, breaking even.

i’ve worked with her on behalf of clients in the past, and she’s reviewing the book by the woman i work for now. her post is on how marketing people (like me) can get bloggers and writers (like her) to work with them. she uses me as an example of what to do to encourage the afore-mentioned partnership, and i must say i’m quite flattered :-).

since i don’t talk that much about what i do professionally on this blog - although i mean to! - i thought this would be a good chance for anyone interested to get an idea of what i spend my hours (and hours) doing - and why i can legitimately spend most of my day on facebook. read her post here!

being necessary

i always wanted to be “necessary” in my jobs or my career. not in the way that a relief worker is necessary - or people will starve - or in the way a surgeon is necessary - or people could suffer and die - but simply in the ways that related to my job. i guess everyone probably has a bit of that desire, but i’d venture to say that i went further out of my way than most people to convince myself that i WAS necessary: i’d sit in on meetings that i didn’t really have to be a part of, i’d come in early to work - even when i wasn’t asked - if there was a crisis and they needed extra help, i’d volunteer for all the special projects, train the new hires, etc. etc. and not because i was trying to get ahead or because i was trying to get in good with my bosses, but because i really wanted to believe that what i did was a necessary function.

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i’m a pro at turning down jobs

i’ve started writing guest blogs over at collegefinance101.com, and my first post is on the “art” of turning down a job. i’m practically a pro at doing this, as i’ve refused a disproportionate amount of jobs considering the length of my career - so when should you turn something down, and should you ever rufuse employment in a recession? here’s an excerpt from the post:

I’ve turned down about as many jobs as I’ve taken, and yes - some of them have even been offered during this recession. Yet, I haven’t once regretted the decision to pass on a certain offer. These decisions haven’t always been easy (some have!), but I feel confident I’ve made the right one largely because I know I have a game plan that I’m sticking to. While each decision to accept or turn down a job is very personal, there are a few guidelines that can help when you’re on the fence about a position. A few things to consider…

continue reading the rest of the post here.

i [heart] risk

ok, that statement isn’t ENTIRELY true. there are certain types of risk that make me super-un-easy. and i’m not saying i jump in with both feel without doing the research. but i’ve come to realize i’m far more OK with risk than most people. a lot of this has to do with ryan, who also loves risk - he tends to feel that if you’re not risking something, you’re playing it too safe. and of course, there’s the old cliche, the greater the risk the greater the reward.

a lot of it has to do with my friends - many of whom are entrepreneurs - their examples, support, and encouragement. then there’s the factor of where we live. San Francisco and Silicon Valley are areas built on risk. you can’t sit in a coffee shop without hearing several conversations about start-ups, funding, elevator pitches, etc. We live in the “entrepreneurship bubble” and i have to remember that this area is HIGHLY concentrated with unlikely stories of people who have risked it all to hit superstardom, or at least risked a lot to succeed. of course some have lost it all - but if nothing else they risked it for something they believed in.

and … a lot of my risk-loving - especially the components that existed prior to ryan and San Francisco - comes from my military upbringing. it contributes to my feeling that “if you’re not moving on, you’re not challenging yourself.” growing up, “moving on” usually meant literally MOVING, but as i’ve grown up it’s coming to mean other things.

Another reason I’m a fan of risk is that big dreams usually come with some degree of risk. and i was brought up to believe that i can - and SHOULD! - actually achieve my dreams. it’s taken me a while to mold these dreams but as i have, this seeming cliche has become more important to me.

we bought our first investment property at 21 (and the two to follow) with the dream that these will help us on our road to financial independence. i.e. not HAVING to work if we don’t want to.

we moved to the city - to fulfill our dream of living somewhere awesome  - with no jobs, no apartment and no furniture.

when i didn’t want to be a slave to an employer any more, i quit my job to work for myself.

i founded an eco-friendly pet product company to get a start on my dream of working with animals and doing everything i can to make their life - and our planet’s life - better.

there are many more in this list, but these show varying degrees of risk. and when i look at some of them “on paper” they look downright stupid. and i’ll admit we haven’t always made the best-advised decisions, but i think as we’ve matured we’ve gotten better at taking calculated risks as opposed to blind risks.

for me, i think it comes down to, “what’s it going to take to make my dreams a reality?” or, “what do i need to do to change the world in a way only i can.” I’m not talking about risking it all for delusions of grandeur, but we each have a passion, purpose and dream that is uniquely ours. and finding the road to fulfilling that purpose will, likely, not be risk-free.